Kicking a deadly habit.

It has been 2 weeks. Yes, I do have the urge once a while. There were times the voice inside me said, “Go ahead after all its just one cigarette.”

I will be 45 years old this May and I started smoking when I was 21. God knows what goes inside of my lungs. Half a year ago, I started cutting down on my smoking. A pack of cigarette lasted me for 2 days. And recently I switched to e-cigarette. This product contains no tar and other harmful substances, only smoker can smell the smoke, does not produce second-hand smoke. Health and environmental protection is the most prominent feature of this product. It is the best alternative to conventional cigarettes.

My first cigarette was Dunhill which I shared with my cousin, Ratana. I did not get hooked on it instantly. In a way, I built myself to adapt to the new habit. I learned to become a smoker! Then I smoked Benson & Hedges, Salem Lights, and Marlborough. When I was in the States it took quite a while for me to adapt to their cigarettes. Virginia Slims, Benson Lights, Marlborough and finally Camel.
My dad found out first than my mom. They were not mad but I am pretty sure they discussed of my new bad habit. Dad was cooled and he did not freaked out. He took me out for lunch and told me how he got himself hooked with smoking. He said that he is not going to stop me from becoming a smoker. He will leave it for me to decide. I felt embarrassed.
I smoked openly in my early years, the attitude was, why bother? Its my life. Than when I started to have children, I was more concern of offending other people, like I don't smoke in front of elderly people in public. I was more aware of my surroundings whether it was appropriate for me to smoke. Is it respect? Or hypocrite?
I don't smoke when I drive. I don't smoke when I am at work. I don't take cigarettes breaks. And of course, I surely did not smoke throughout my pregnancy period, twice. And then, now. The kids are grown up and they are aware the dangerous of smoking. When my husband also a smoker, was touched my son's plea, he decide to stop smoking and switched to e-cigarette. I was a bit skeptical but I know I would have to follow soon.
Insya Allah, I hope I'm given the will power to fight this battle.

And, the fight continues.......